I wrote this song about a friend, I don't think I do that alot. It is specifically about their identity as a nonbinary transgender person and the way that their strength and stories inspire me every day. I have known them long enough to see them go through stages of self-discovery and realization and they have taught me so much about the world and myself.
Simply put, "nonbinary" is a catch-all term (among others) for folks who identify as between and/or outside of our society's prescribed gender binary (the idea that you can only be male OR female/masculine OR feminine, no exceptions). It is hard to receive basic respect and dignity from the outside world when you identify and present in this way. Most people in our society do not even believe this a valid or "real" way to identify. The truth is that gender is much more complex than what many of us were ever taught and there is increasing evidence that gender diversity outside of our strict binary has existed in hundreds of cultures throughout human existence and continues to this day.
I'm gonna have links and all that in the comments for anyone who is interested in learning more. Also, as always, send me a message if you'd like to talk about this more. I'm no expert, but I'm down to talk and share words and resources by people who have written on this subject much better than I currently can.
Disclaimer: This song is just my personal interpretation and view of one person's experience in a light and fun way. It is not meant to be fully representative of their personal experience or the experience of any nonbinary, gender nonconforming, and/or trans people. The ideas and language involved are usually much more complex and I hope that this song only serves as a small window into a very diverse and constantly growing/reforming area.
lyrics
Well you were singin along, yeah you know the song, about kewpie dolls and urine stalls
and the way your eyes did shine, it made me melt
And growin up, you had your doubts, a destiny you had to get out of
and I will never know just how it felt
But now you’re finding your own way and you are fighting every day
you inspire me to keep workin for change
And you were cryin when you told me, but it wasn’t a surprise
you weren’t like the other girls, you weren’t like the other guys
You were joinin folks across America
They’re letting go of gender roles
You give me hope and that’s all I need
You are the flower growin in the concrete
And you were talkin about what you had to do, fighting off the pink or blue
the way so many kids are forced to hide
The growing pains, the wax and wane, finding peace in another name
breaking off those chains of pickin sides
And you are breaking all the rules, and you aint usin the masters tools
yeah you are scarin all those fuckheads out their shoes
your identity is building a better world
you’re not like the other guys, you’re not like the other girls
You’re joinin folks across America
They’re not controlled by gender roles
You give me hope and that’s all I need
You are the flower, growin in the concrete
There is a liberated frequency you’re sending out to me
I start to look inside, oh yeah, and this is what I see
a little kid who’s not afraid to like the things they like
a hammer to the walls they built around our hearts and minds
You’re joinin folks across the whole damn world
They’re not controlled by gender roles
You give me hope and that’s all I need
You are the flower growin in the concrete
So what I’m sayin, yeah what I mean
is you’re not totally a girl, you’re not totally a guy, and that’s totally fine with me
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